« Does This Make Me a Natalie Portman Groupie? »
Natalie Portman is a badass celebrity hottie. Okay, there I said it.
As some Doe-Nuts will attest, I tend to focus my dating efforts on non-celebrities. Usually this includes me slurring out one or all of the following one-liners:
1. Hey, what's your name?
3. Your Dad's a thief. Pay up.
Or the coup de grace:
4-10. So we gonna do it?
But I digress. And it's less excusable than usual for we have on this post, before our very eyes, the loveliness that is Natalie Portman.
Yes, the chick from Star Wars.
And, yes, I know, Holy Shit, Mike Doe!
Holy Shit, indeed.
Natalie Portman has great knockers.
Holy shit, man! You can see Natalie Portman's b**bs!
Natalie Portman strikes a classy pose, bitches.
Yes, I need to grow up. But damn.
For more Natalie Portman groupie action, click here.
And just because it is hilarious and I'd hate for anyone not to watch it, even if you've already seen it 20 times like me: the Natalie Portman gangsta rap video from Saturday Night Live.
Natalie Portman is NOT a role model. But she is one crazy-ass bitch. Allegedly.
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