Somebody Is Fucking Matt Damon AND Her Name Ain't Sara!
It's SaraH Silverman, of course, who is fucking Matt Damon. This video hit Hollywood by storm a few weeks past, but few insiders were surprised. This chick has screwed more comedians than Carlos "Ain't Never Seen No Joke He Wouldn't Copy Word-for-Word, Ese" Mencia. I mean, Sarah Silverman allegedly dated Carrot Top for chrissakes. BEFORE "he" went on steroids. And got his eyebrows done.

This time, though, the joke's on her boyfriend-slash-booking agent, Jimmy Kimmel, host of ABC's late night talk show, which is rumored to be still on the air. Reports are already circulating that Kimmel has turned to Ben Affleck for comfort, although this could just be utter nonsense made up by someone hoping for a few seconds of fleeting Internet celebrity himself. (Call me.)
To get the inside scoop on how this video has affected Matt Damon and his Hollywood best friend, Ben Affleck, click here.
To make fun of the 40-year old married virgin, Gary Coleman, click here.
To send Mike Doe lots of dough, click here.
Otherwise, click here.

Reader Comments (3)
mmmmmmm matt damon
1) Sarah is really Johnathan Silverman, star of classics such as Weekend at Bernie's II.
2) omg wtf happened to carrot top? I'm scared, er scarred!
Wait, is that Carrot Top or Reba?